The One Commandment

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 🪨 Somewhere around 2020, humanity collectively decided the most important commandment was apparently: “Thou shalt keep six feet or further apart at all times.”

Honestly? It probably would’ve prevented a shocking amount of trouble. Hard to punch a guy in a bar, steal his wallet, sleep with his spouse, or start a fistfight at Thanksgiving when everybody’s socially distancing like frightened raccoons at Home Depot.

This vintage-style sarcastic tee is a loving little homage to the weirdest timeline most of us have ever lived through — floor stickers, mask arguments, empty toilet paper aisles, and that one guy aggressively disinfecting bananas in the grocery store parking lot.

Perfect for introverts, antisocial professionals, exhausted retail workers, recovering germaphobes, and anyone who quietly realized during lockdown that staying away from people was actually pretty fantastic.

Stay back. Respectfully.

CHOOSE WHICH FABRIC YOU LIKE BEST - ALL HEATHER COLORS ARE A POLYESTER/COTTON BLEND – ALL OTHERS ARE 100% COTTON

👕 Printed on Bella + Canvas 3001 CVC: • Ultra-soft blend (52% Airlume cotton / 48% poly) • Lightweight, breathable, durable • Unique “Heathered” appearance • DTG printed with vivid detail and long-lasting ink

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🩵 Printed on Bella + Canvas 3001 Cotton: • 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (soft as a lullaby, hits like a jolt) • Lightweight feel (4.2 oz/yd²), perfect for layering or wearing solo • Pre-shrunk to minimize surprises in the dryer • Side-seamed and shoulder-taped for structure and comfort • DTG printed with clean, bold ink that won’t flake out before you do

🧼 Care Instructions: • Turn inside out before washing • Machine wash cold with like colors • Tumble dry low or hang dry like your mom used to • Do not iron the design unless you want regrets.